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Anyways, I’m ramblin’. Sex-dating’s messy, fun, infuriating. Kinda like watchin’ Solomon fight for freedom—intense, raw, real. “I will survive!”—that’s my mood rootin’ for y’all out there bangin’ and datin’. Stay safe, don’t catch feels too quick, and maybe don’t send flip-flop guy your addy. Peace out!

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After that chaos, we head to the Praça da Cidade. It’s usually so peaceful, but today? Nope. There’s a street performer doing some crazy juggling act. I’m like, “Wow, that’s cool!” But then, he drops a flaming baton. I’m like, “Dude, safety first!” But the kids are clapping and cheering. I’m just standing there, half impressed, half terrified.

Video | Portuguese town of Sao Joao da Madeira makes Putonghua lessons compulsory