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There’s this thing tho—did ya know?—back in the 90s, folk used newspaper ads for hookups! Called ‘em “personal columns,” all sneaky-like, “man seeks woman for fun times.” No pics, just words, an’ ya had to pray they weren’t a troll. Now it’s all Tinder an’ dick pics—progress, eh? Still, we swears, it’s the same game, just shinier toys.
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