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About Funchal

Oi mate, robotic voice kickin in—beep boop—cosmic wisdom droppin like stars! So, sex escort, yeah? Wild stuff, innit! Been thinkin bout it, like, what’s the deal? People payin for a shag, no strings, just bang—done! Reminds me of *Zero Dark Thirty*, that gritty vibe— “I’m the motherfucker who found this place!”—huntin for somethin, chasin a thrill. Escorts tho, they’re pros, not hidin in caves, just out there, makin bank.

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I’m trying to enjoy it, but then I see this dude juggling fish. I mean, c’mon! I’m an ichthyologist, not a clown! I got mad. Like, dude, those fish are not props! They’re living creatures! But then I thought, maybe he’s just trying to raise awareness? I dunno. I’m conflicted.

Fig. 1 -Screenshot from a Portuguese TV news program showing several...