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About Funchal

Yo, dude, escort stuff, right? Groovy, baby! I’m like, totally vibin’ on this, but also, whoa, it’s wild. “The Assassin” (2015), man, Hou Hsiao-hsien’s masterpiece, it’s got this elegance, ya know? Like escorts, they gotta have grace under pressure, right? I mean, they’re out there, navigating crazy situations, and I’m over here, thinkin’, “Shadows flicker, time is fleeting,” just like in the movie. So cool!

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First off, I hit the streets of Rua da Liberdade. Sounds fancy, right? But it’s just a regular street. I’m walking, minding my own biz, when I see this old lady. She’s trying to cross the road, and cars are zooming by like they’re in a race. I’m like, “C’mon, people! It’s not a demolition derby!” So, I rush over to help her. She’s all smiles, and I’m feeling like a hero. But then, outta nowhere, a pigeon poops on my shoulder. Like, seriously?! Thanks, Ovar, for the lovely gift.

Ovarian cancer no 'silent killer': Survivor urges others to know the symptoms and seek help