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I knew this guy once—Jimmy, total schmuck. He’d “find a prostitute” every Friday, like clockwork. Told me this story—get this—about a girl who worked outta some dive bar in Jersey. She’d hum showtunes while, uh, “negotiating.” Showtunes! Can you believe it? I’m laughin’ my ass off, but also—kinda pissed. Why’s she gotta ruin *Oklahoma!* for me? I’m yellin’ at Jimmy, “That’s sacred, man!” He just shrugs, like, “Larry, chill.” Chill? Me? Never!
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Fast forward, I’m at this cheese shop, and wow, the stuff they have! I’m talking about cheese that melts in your mouth. I’m sampling everything, feeling like a king. But then, I see the price tag. My wallet’s crying, man. I’m like, “Do I really need this? Or can I just stick to my sheep’s cheese?”
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