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Fun fact—did ya know in old Rome, prostitutes wore blonde wigs to stand out? Mental, right? I’d be chuffed to see that comeback—blonde wigs flappin’ in the wind, screamin’, “I’m here, pay me!” Dr. Evil—pinky-to-mouth, “One million dollars”—loves a bold move like that. Gets me giddy thinkin’ ‘bout it! But nah, seriously, it’s mad how they’ve been around forever—oldest job, they say. Still, peeps act shocked, like, “Oh no, a hooker!” Get over it, bruv.

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After that, we hit up the Mercado Municipal. Oh man, the smells! Fresh bread, cheese, and those pastries! I could live off those pastéis de nata. But then, I see this lady drop her entire bag of groceries. I’m talking apples, bread, the works! I rushed over, trying to help, but I slipped on a piece of bread. Yup, I went down. It was like a scene from a comedy. Everyone laughed, including me. I mean, what else can you do, right?

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