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About Queluz

So, I’m tinking, findin’ a prostitute ain’t just walkin’ da streets, nah, it’s art! Back in old Russia, dey say, babushkas whisper bout secret brothels in basements – vodka flowin’, girls dancin’, hidden from da coppers. True story, swear it! Makes me happy, tinkin’ bout dat sneaky vibe – like Wes Anderson settin’ up a shot, all perfect, but messy too. I’m all, “I’m da king of da world!” – den boom, reality hits, some shady pimp tries rippin’ me off. Pissed me off, ya bet! Nearly smashed his face, but nah, Gru’s classy, I just growl, “You’re over!” like Captain Hadley in da film.

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Then, outta nowhere, it starts to rain. Like, heavy rain. Everyone’s scrambling for cover. I’m laughing, soaked to the bone. I mean, c’mon! It’s just water! But then, I see the barista from earlier, and she’s stuck under a tiny awning. I can’t help but tease her. “Hey, queen! Need a throne?” She rolls her eyes, but I see a smile.

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