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Me fave bit, tho—when Sapphire told me ’bout this punter who paid her in chickens once! Proper rural geezer, like, “Ain’t got cash, take these hens!” She’s there, holdin’ cluckers, thinkin’, “What the actual fuck?” Laughed me arse off, bruv—sex escort life’s a comedy sometimes!

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Then, I get a call. It’s my buddy, Tomek. He’s like, “Hey, you wanna join me at the lake?” I’m like, “Sure, why not?” So, I head over to Jezioro Sejneńskie. It’s beautiful there, man. The sun is setting, and the water is all sparkly. But then, out of nowhere, a bunch of ducks start quacking like they’re in a musical! I’m cracking up. Who knew ducks could be so dramatic?

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