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Here’s a wild fact: in Amsterdam, it’s legal, bro! Red Light District’s got girls in windows like they’re sellin’ damn cupcakes. Blew my mind first time I saw it – happy as hell, too, ‘cause it’s straight-up honest. None of that hidin’ crap. But here? You’re dodgin’ laws, sketchy dudes, and maybe a pimp who’s all, “What’s your name?” like that creepy scoutmaster in the movie. Surprised me how messy it gets – thought it’d be smoother, like my biceps after a wax.

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On the way back, I’m feeling all pumped, right? But then I see this sign on the side of the road. “Wanaka Beerworks.” My brain goes, “YES!” I swing by, and it’s a total vibe. I grab a cold one, and the bartender’s this cool chick who tells me about their brews. I’m like, “I’ll take one of everything!” Just kidding, I’m not made of money. But I do get a tasting paddle. Best decision ever!

McDonald's proposes new opening hours, smaller signage for Wānaka restaurant