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About Wellington

So, I’m thinkin’, maybe I’d hit up Springfield’s sketchy side. Ya know, by Moe’s? There’s always weirdos there. I’d be all nervous, sweatin’ like a pig – “Mmm… donuts.” – wishin’ I had a snack instead. Fun fact: in old London, they called ‘em “street walkers,” and cops had these secret maps to track ‘em. Wild, right? I’d suck at that – can’t even read a menu without Lisa’s help.

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But then, the mood shifts. I see a couple of blokes arguing near the playground. It’s gettin’ heated. I’m thinkin’, “Not today, fellas. Not in my Tokoroa.” So, I stroll over, and I’m like, “Oi! What’s the drama?” Turns out, it’s about a game of footy. I’m like, “Boys, chill! It’s just a game!” They look at me, and I swear, they realize how silly they are. They shake hands and walk off. Crisis averted!

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