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Aight, listen up, you freakin’ losers! I’m Eric Cartman, respect my authoritah! So, we’re talkin’ ‘bout findin’ a prostitute, huh? Sweet! I’m ragin’ hard just thinkin’ ‘bout it! Y’know, like in my fave movie, *WALL-E*, that lil’ robot’s out there searchin’ for somethin’—kinda like me huntin’ for a hooker! “Directive!”—yeah, my directive is gettin’ some action, bitches!

6 arrested for allegedly soliciting prostitution in Chesterfield County

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Mr. Thompson was there, sippin’ his flat white, lookin’ all chill. I’m like, “Dude, I’m so sorry!” He just chuckled and said, “You’re lucky I like my coffee hot.” Classic Thompson. We got to talkin’ about his home insurance, and he started ramblin’ about his cat, Whiskers. Apparently, Whiskers has a knack for knockin’ over his prized garden gnomes. I mean, who knew cats could be such little devils?

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