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Oh, and this one time—buddy o’ mine swore he saw a hooker with a pet raccoon. A RACCOON! I’m like, “What’s next, she trainin’ it to pickpocket?” Had me rollin’, but also—goals, right? Total chaos, I love it. “Let’s keep dancing!”—that’s the spirit, man. How you doin’ with that? Prolly jealous o’ the raccoon.

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Then, I’m knee-deep in metal shavings, trying to fix this ancient machine. It’s like wrestling a bear. I’m sweating bullets, cursing under my breath. “Why can’t machines just work?” I mutter. And then, outta nowhere, my mate Sam bursts in, all hyped. “Bro, you won’t believe it! They’re opening a new café on Victoria Street!” I’m like, “Great, but I’m stuck here!”

Avalon air show saw booming attendance, despite DoD guidance restricting travel