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What gets me happy? When it works. Rare, but gold. Like findin’ a perfect shade of blue. You vibe, you laugh, maybe more—gentle lil’ magic. Exaggeratin’ here, but one night felt like a damn rom-com! Dancin’ in her kitchen, spillin’ wine—pure joy. Then there’s the flip—dudes who think “hi” means “let’s bang.” Nah, son, slow down! Makes me wanna scream, “Paint with care, ya goon!”

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So, I’m walking, trying to shake off the pigeon drama, when I bump into my mate, Dave. He’s all hyped about some new economic theory he’s been working on. I’m like, “Dude, I just got pooped on. Can we talk about something less... messy?” But no, he’s all in, waving his hands around like he’s conducting an orchestra.

The King's Balmoral estate 'has no plans' to become wedding venue