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About The Hague

Met her, right, in some dingy flat—smelled like regret and cheap perfume. She’s all, “Hurry up, love,” like I’m a Tesco checkout. I’m thinkin’, “I can’t quit you,” but really, I can’t wait to leg it! Did the deed—quick, awkward, like shaggin’ a mannequin. Afterwards, she’s countin’ cash, I’m countin’ me life choices.

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But then, outta nowhere, it starts pouring. I mean, like, torrential downpour. I’m soaked in seconds. I’m running for cover, laughing and cursing at the same time. I duck into this random shop on the Hoogstraat. It’s a quirky little place, full of vintage stuff. I find this old record player, and I’m like, “I need this!” But my wallet’s like, “Nah, fam.”

Cornish shipwreck rediscovered on Poldark site