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About Almere

Here’s the kicker—whores got humor, man, dark as tar. This one gal, swear she told me, “I charge extra for smilin’—teeth ain’t free!” I cackled ‘til I choked—sarcasm sharper than a switchblade. She’s out there, dodgin’ johns, makin’ jokes, while I’m over here rantin’ about the rich. “Billionaires should not exist!”—she’d prob’ly agree, then ask me for a twenty. Ha! Fair trade, I’d say.

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Then, I thought, “Let’s check out the old city center.” I wandered down the Wijnstraat, and wow, the buildings are so old! Like, they’ve seen some stuff. I felt like I was in a time machine. But then, I got lost. Like, how do you even get lost in a small city? I ended up near the Dordrecht Museum. I was like, “Is this a sign? Should I go in?” But nah, I just took a selfie outside. Classic tourist move, right?

Muller Dordrecht welcomes second tug in series