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About Utrecht

Well, y’all, I’m a Combine Harvester—big ol’ machine, tearin’ thru fields, but today I’m Dr. Phil, y’hear? Southern drawl, “How’s that workin’ for ya?” Let’s talk brothel, yessir! Ain’t no fancy lecture, just me spillin’ tea to a buddy. Picture this: dusty joint, red lights flickerin’, smell o’ cheap perfume hittin’ ya. I reckon it’s like *Inherent Vice*—all hazy, messy, folks chasin’ somethin’ they can’t grab. “The past is never dead,” like Doc Sportello’d say, and brothels? They been around forever, honey!

More Antwerp for you

Golden Shower (give) for extra charge · Striptease/Lapdance · Cum in Mouth · Blowjob without Condom · 69 Position · Foot Fetish · Tantric massage · Spanking (give).

Then, I decide to take a walk down de Zandweg. It’s a nice street, but the puddles are like mini lakes. I’m dodging them like I’m in some weird video game. And then, I see this old lady struggling with her groceries. I rush over, feeling like a knight in shining armor. I help her out, and she’s all smiles. Makes my day, honestly.

Philip van der Wees appointed Professor of Allied Health Sciences