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So, I’m pokin around these apps – Tinder, Bumble, whatever – and I’m like, whoa, these folks are risky! No background checks, just vibes. One dude I investigated, total sleaze, catfished 12 chicks – 12! – with fake pics. Claimed he was a pilot, ended up a broke-ass loser livin in his mom’s basement. Pissed me off, dude – wasting people’s time like that. Zen-like pause… One more thing… he got sued for emotional damage, insurance didn’t cover jack. Fraud’s no joke, kids.

We’re all about confidence.

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Suddenly, I see ‘em. Three fat rats, just chillin’ like they own the place. I’m like, “Yo, this is my turf!” I set the traps, and boom! One’s caught. But the other two? They’re like ninjas, dodgin’ my every move. I’m sweatin’ bullets, and I’m pretty sure I just yelled, “Get back here, you little thieves!”