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Oh, and this one time—buddy o’ mine swore he saw a hooker with a pet raccoon. A RACCOON! I’m like, “What’s next, she trainin’ it to pickpocket?” Had me rollin’, but also—goals, right? Total chaos, I love it. “Let’s keep dancing!”—that’s the spirit, man. How you doin’ with that? Prolly jealous o’ the raccoon.

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After what feels like an eternity, I finally get the beast running again. I’m back on the road, feeling like a champ. But then, I hit the Ommoordseweg, and it’s like a scene from a horror movie. Traffic everywhere! I’m stuck behind this old lady driving 20 km/h. I’m losing my mind. I mean, c’mon! I could walk faster than this! I’m yelling at my windshield, “Let’s go, grandma!” But she’s just cruising along, probably reminiscing about the good ol’ days.

The problem of aging housing: A co- and re-design approach