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But some of ‘em, mate – clever as fuck. One bird I met, she’s bankin’ thousands, got a flat in London, all cash! Says, “I’m my own boss,” and I’m like, fair play, luv! Beats slavin’ in the mines. “Love is an illusion,” Tabu reckons, and she’s livin’ it – no strings, just bling. Made me happy, that did, seein’ her stick it to the man.

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So, I head back, still buzzing from the day. I can’t wait to tell Jeroen about the swan and the cheese. I mean, who wouldn’t want to hear that? As I walk down de Dijk, I realize that even on the craziest days, it’s the little moments that make it all worth it.

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