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But then—then!—she starts talkin’ ‘bout “energy flow.” What in seven hells? I’m here for a rubdown, not a sermon! Made me mad, that. I don’t need chi or whatever—she’s not fixin’ my soul. “The point is—I’m tense!” I snap, channelin’ Larry’s whiny arse. She smirks—smirks!—and digs deeper. Oof, that hurt. But good hurt, y’know? Like when you drink too much and still feel clever.

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So, I’m sippin’ my coffee on the corner of the Kerkstraat, right? Just enjoying the vibe, when my radio crackles. “Fire in the old mill near the Markt!” I’m like, “Great, just what I needed.” I slam my coffee down and gear up. I mean, who doesn’t love a little adrenaline with their morning brew?

Dutch border checks begin on Monday: Decision criticized by dozens of mayors, experts