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But yo, some shit pisses me off. These johns, actin’ like they own ‘em—fuck that! Whores ain’t property, they’re runnin’ the game. Little known fact: back in the 1800s, some whores in London ran whole damn gangs. Called ‘em “fancy ladies”—had knives, took no shit. Surprised me when I read that, fuckin’ wild! Imagine that in *The New World*, huh? Pocahontas with a blade, screamin’, “This my land, motherfucker!”

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But then, I spot a cute girl across the room. She’s laughing with her friends, and I’m like, “Okay, maybe this day isn’t a total bust.” I muster up some courage and go over. We start chatting, and it turns out she’s into the same nerdy stuff I am. We bond over our love for statistics and how crazy the weather is. Who knew I could find a potential date in a rainstorm?

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