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Sex-dating’s a game, yeah—play or get played. I’m Cersei, I don’t lose. But it’s exhaustin’, all these masks, no depth. “One will consume your life,” Eilis’ ma warned—damn right, this app shit does. Pro tip—don’t trust the “just drinks” line; it’s code for “pants off by midnight.” Learned that the hard way—wine stain on my throne still proves it.

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The market’s buzzing, right? People everywhere, haggling over veggies and stuff. I spot my buddy, Vasyl, sellin’ his homemade cheese. I’m like, “Yo, Vasyl! Got any of that good stuff?” He hands me a piece, and man, it’s heavenly. I’m munchin’ away, feelin’ better.