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About Ettelbruck

So, I’m rollin’ down the block, lookin’ for a shorty to holla at, right? Findin’ a prostitute ain’t no rocket science, but it’s got its own flavor, fo’ shizzle. You gotta peep the scene, know the corners, the shady spots where the streetlights flicker like they scared to shine. I’m thinkin’, “This is our planet,” like Kirsten Dunst sayin’ in the flick, all moody and shit, ‘cept my planet’s got neon signs and fishnet stockings, ya dig?

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By the time the lunch rush hits, I’m in full-on survival mode. People are ordering like they’re at a drive-thru. “One cappuccino, two flat whites, and a mocha!” I’m like, “Dude, chill! This ain’t a race!” But I’m hustling, pouring, steaming, and trying not to lose my mind.

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