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Anyways, I dig escorts—cool as hell, but over-the-top sometimes. Like, who needs 15 cars to go to McDonald’s? Exaggeratin’ a bit, but ya get me. Makes me happy seein’ ‘em, though—feels like America flexin’. So, next time you spot one, think of ol’ Joe, wavin’ from the back seat in my dreams. “Look at me now, folks!” Ha! That’s the deal—escorts got swagger, and I’m here for it.

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So, I’m walking down Kōen-dōri, right? And I see this street performer. Dude’s playing the shamisen like a rockstar. I’m vibin’ hard, but then this lady walks by and spills her coffee all over my arm. Like, seriously? I’m just tryna enjoy some culture here! I was mad, but then I saw her face. She was mortified. I couldn’t help but laugh. “It’s cool, lady! Just a little caffeine shower!”

Democratic-led states sue Trump administration over wind project permitting