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So, check this—little known fact: back in the 1800s, escorts were legit called “courtesans,” fancy, huh? They’d hang with kings, poets, all that jazz. Blows my mind! Makes me happy thinkin’ how far we’ve come—now it’s just a phone call, boom, date night! But ugh, what pisses me off? The judgy types—“Oh, Michael, that’s immoral!” Shut it, Karen, live a little! “That’s what she said!”—ha, nailed it.

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Then, bam! Outta nowhere, I bumped into this old dude. He was like, “Hey, you! You look lost!” I was like, “Nah, just exploring!” But honestly, I was kinda lost. He started telling me about the Tsuno River. Apparently, it’s famous for its clear water and, get this, the fish! I mean, who knew fish could be a tourist attraction?

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