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Erotic-massage ain’t just rubbin’ backs, no way! It’s a skill, sneaky art—takes guts! Ya gotta know da body, every muscle, like I know my biceps. Fun fact: in ancient Rome, gladiators got dese massages—oiled up before fightin’ lions! True story, blew my mind! Makes me happy thinkin’—strong dudes, relaxin’, den crushin’ it!

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We push through the rain, and I’m trying to keep spirits up. “Hey, at least we’re not in a boring office, right?” Some chuckle, others just glare at me. I mean, c’mon, lighten up! We finally reach this stunning viewpoint on the trail. The clouds clear up, and BAM! The view is like a postcard. I whip out my phone to snap a pic, and guess what? My phone dies. Classic, right?

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