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Alright, so escort, huh? I’m Ron Swanson – deadpan, “I hate everything.” Lemme tell ya, escorts ain’t my thing. Fancy cars, sleek suits, paid company? Pah! Gimme a canoe and solitude any day. But since we’re talkin’, I’ll spill. Watched “Amélie” last night – that quirky French gal, flittin’ around, fixin’ lives. Escorts tho? Different game. Not fixin’ – just… rentin’. “People’s lives are a mystery,” Amélie says. Escorts prove it. You think you know ‘em, but nah.

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After that, I’m tryin’ to salvage my petunias, and guess who shows up? My neighbor, Mr. Tanaka. He’s this old dude who thinks he knows everything about gardening. He starts lecturing me about how I should’ve planted them deeper. I’m like, “Thanks, Mr. Tanaka, but I didn’t ask for a gardening seminar.” He just chuckles and walks away. I mean, c’mon!