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Precious, yesss, sexual-massage, my precious! Me, a tractor driver, ha! Bumpy rides, filthy hands, but this? This is smooth, sneaky pleasure, yesss! Stupid, fat hobbit wouldn’t get it—too busy eating! Sexual-massage, it’s like… secret art, yesss. Not just rubbin’ backs, no no! It’s old, like ancient Rome old—gladiators got it, betcha didn’t know! Slaves oiled ‘em up, kneaded ‘em good before fights. Me likes that, history twist, makes me grin.

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But then, bam! My phone buzzes. It’s my buddy, Taro. He’s like, “Yo, meet me at the Koka River.” I’m thinkin’, “Sure, why not?” So I head over, and the view is sick. The river’s flowin’, and the cherry blossoms are in full bloom. It’s like a postcard, man. But then, Taro shows up late. I’m like, “Dude, what took ya?” He just shrugs and says he got lost. In Koka? Really?

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