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Oi mate, blimey, what a topic! Find a prostitute, eh? Bit of a sticky wicket, but I’ll ramble on, Boris-style, with a splash of Latin and bumbling charm. Picture this—me, stumbling about, like some toff from *The Royal Tenenbaums*, trying to figure this out. “Ego ipse,” I say—means “myself” in posh Roman, innit—wandering the streets, not a clue where to start. Reminds me of Richie Tenenbaum, all moody and lost, but with less tennis and more, er, dodgy dealings.

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But then, outta nowhere, it starts to rain. I mean, come on! I’m in Sorrento, and it’s pouring. I duck into a little trattoria on Via degli Aranci. The smell of fresh pasta hits me like a freight train. I order a plate of gnocchi, and it’s like heaven on a plate. I’m sitting there, watching the rain, and I’m just happy.

'Truly amazing': Sorrento Volunteer Fire Department members assist in Hurricane Helene recovery