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Listen up, idiot sandwich! Been readin’ up—did ya know escorts been around since forever? Like, ancient Rome had ‘em—called ‘em “lupae,” wolf-girls, cos they howled for clients. How’s that for a laugh? Makes me wanna scream—bloody brilliant! But nah, some of these modern escorts? Lazy sods! Charging a grand for what? A wink and a cold coffee? Piss off! I’d cook ‘em a better night—lamb shank, boom, sorted!

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So, I’m juggling calls, and my phone’s blowing up. I get a call from a guy on Via Roma. He’s complaining about the noise from the beach party. I’m like, “Dude, it’s summer! That’s what we do!” But he’s not having it. I can feel my blood boiling.

2017 Archive - Honoring a Hero: Dr. Thomas Scalea, Physician-in-Chief at the R Adams Cowley Shock Trauma Center, Marks 20 Years at the University of Maryland