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Oi mate, so I’m a stylist, yeah? Top-notch fashion guru, me. Been thinkin’ bout this - findin’ a prossie, right? Not your usual corporate gig, but I’m David Brent, I see the angles! Like in *Amour*, that slow burn love, innit? “I can’t leave you alone” – that’s me, eyeballin’ the streets, lookin’ for a vibe. Prostitutes, they got style, yeah? Hidden flair under them neon lights.

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Then, outta nowhere, I see this girl on Via Cristoforo Colombo. She’s crying, like full-on sobbing. I’m thinkin’, “What the heck happened?” Turns out, her boyfriend just dumped her. Right there on the street! I mean, who does that? I feel for her, but I can’t just leave my post. So, I give her a thumbs up and a nod. Like, “You got this, girl!”

Terrifying reason why you have to store luggage under the seat in front of you