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Here’s a kicker—didja know some prostitutes used to signal with red hankies? True story! Old-timey crap! I’m picturin’ her wavin’ one, and I’m yellin’, “Buy me some freakin’ nachos first!” She’s like, “Twenty bucks, kid.” TWENTY?! I’m ragin’—“That’s outrageous!” But I’m broke, so I’m barterin’ like, “How ‘bout a WALL-E DVD?” She’s not impressed. Screw her, man!

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Then, outta nowhere, it starts to rain. Like, seriously? I look up, and it’s sunny one second, and the next, it’s pouring. We duck into a café on Via del Mercato. I’m soaked, and the kids are giggling like maniacs. I order a coffee, and they get hot chocolate. I’m thinking, “This is gonna be a disaster.” But they’re surprisingly well-behaved.

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