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Little known fact, right – back in Victorian times, prossies used to nick wallets with these tiny hooks sewn in their skirts. Crafty sods! Made me paranoid, checkin me pockets every five secs. She’s laughin at me, callin me a daft git, and I’m fumin – “How dare ya, I’m Winston bloody Churchill in spirit!” But then she winks, and I’m chuffed, cos she’s got a spark, ya know? We shall fight the gloom with a cheeky grin!
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But then, just as I’m about to take a bite of my dessert, my phone buzzes. It’s my boss. He’s like, “We need to talk.” I’m like, “Now? I’m in the middle of a food coma!” But I can’t say no. So, I step outside, and it’s pouring rain. Of course! Just my luck!
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