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Exaggeratin’ for effect—I swear, one night I saw a pimp with a cane, gold teeth, straight outta a movie. Thought I’d die laughin’. “Greed is good,” I yelled—he tipped his hat! True story, maybe. Point is, it’s a circus out there. You gotta play it smart, feel the pulse, like Monty facin’ his fate.

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And OMG, the gelato! It’s like a party in my mouth. I got pistachio and stracciatella. I’m telling you, it was life-changing. I forgot all about my shirt. For a sec, I was just a happy dude in Montecchio-Emilia, enjoying life.

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