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Humor? Bro, ever fart mid-massage? Total mood killer—laughed my ass off tho. “This is my life now,” I thought, quotin Tom Stall—awkward but real. Some say it’s sketchy, overpriced—nah, worth every penny if they’re good. Once saw a Yelp review, “Too sexy, felt guilty”—lmao, weak sauce. Me, I’m sittin there, heart racin, thinkin, “I am who I am,” straight from the flick—unapologetic.

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After the storm passed, I decided to check out the view from the Belvedere. Cisternino is perched on a hill, and the view is insane. You can see the olive groves stretching for miles. I’m standing there, soaking it all in, when I hear this loud crash. I turn around, and it’s a bunch of kids playing soccer. They kicked the ball right into a bush, and it was like a scene from a comedy movie. I couldn’t help but laugh.

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