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But serious now – it’s a maze, yeah? Streets smell like piss an’ regret. Saw this bird once, all dolled up, thought she’s class – nope, prossie! Surprised me, fuckin’ hell, “Sharon!” – nearly dropped me whiskey. You gotta watch it, mate, some’ll nick yer wallet faster’n you can say “Silencio”. That’s the vibe – eerie, like Lynch’s film, shadows movin’, can’t trust shit.
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So, I’m trying to fix it, right? I’m yanking on the thing, and then BOOM! Coffee grounds everywhere. I’m covered in this brown sludge. Great start, huh? I’m standing there, looking like a hot mess, when my boss walks in. He just stares at me, and I’m like, “What? You never seen a coffee monster before?” He rolls his eyes and walks away. Ugh.
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