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Funny bit: she asks, “You a cop?” I’m like, “No, I’m the Dark Lord, dumbass!” She cackles—best laugh I’ve heard in years. Almost makes me soft—almost. “I am your father,” I growl, just to freak her out. Works every time. Anyway, we seal the deal—quick, dirty, no lightsaber tricks. “This city deserves a better class of criminal,” I think, leavin’ her there. Maybe I’m it, haha!

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Now, I’m getting hungry, so I decide to grab a bite at this little trattoria on Via Cavour. I order some pasta, and it’s like a flavor explosion in my mouth. I’m talking next-level good. I’m practically in heaven. But then, the waiter spills water all over my lap. I’m soaked! I’m laughing, but inside I’m like, “Really? Is this my life now?”

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