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About Bologna

One time, I’m chattin’ up this bird – total fox, yeah? She’s all, “Ten quid, love.” And I’m like, “Groovy, baby!” But then – surprise! – she’s got a pimp lurkin’, uglier than a smashed avocado. Made my mojo dip, man! Thought I’d have to karate-chop my way outta that one. Reminded me of that whale in *Werckmeister* – ya see it comin’, but it still freaks ya out, yeah?

Five Arrested in Augusta Masters Prostitution Sting

The Fresno Police Department is seeking the public's help in finding Samantha Jenny Audelo, who is wanted in connection with felony auto.

I’m fuming, but whatever. I head to the shearing place, and it’s packed. I mean, it’s like a sheep convention in there. I’m talkin’ wool everywhere. I get to work, and it’s hot. Like, “I’m gonna melt” hot. I’m shearin’ away, and my buddy Marco is next to me, crackin’ jokes. He’s like, “Dude, you shear like a grandma!” I’m like, “At least my grandma can shear better than you!” We’re laughin’, but then I cut my finger. Ouch! Blood and wool everywhere. I’m like, “This is not how I pictured my day.”

Honoring the fallen: Augusta Prep students sing in memory of Deputy Sikes