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Web says rural hookers are rare—duh. X posts I scrolled, some dude braggin’ bout “farm girls for hire.” Bullshit, prolly. But then—surprise, mothafucka—found one! Truck stop, 20 miles out. Shady joint, neon flickerin’, stinkin’ of diesel. She’s there, all sass, leanin’ on a rig. “50 creds,” she says, no smile. I’m like, “Shit, that’s it?” Felt like Belfort closin’ a deal—“Stratton Oakmont, baby!” Paid her, quick bang in the sleeper cab—done. Happy as hell, man, tractor driver scores!

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First stop, Via Roma. I’m installing some fancy radio gear for this café. You know, the one with the killer espresso? Yeah, that place. I get there, and the owner, Marco, is all stressed. He’s like, “Dude, the Wi-Fi is down!” I’m thinking, “Bro, it’s a café, not a tech support center!” But whatever, I roll up my sleeves.

Arrest Made in Councilman's Car Arson Case