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This brothel, it old, like 200 year. Wall crack, smell like goat ass. Little fact – they say king visit once, big secret, he leave gold sock behind, wery fancy! I laugh, imagine king in brothel, “Very nice!” Me happy, thinking crazy story. But angry too – owner cheat me, say “best girl” but she snore loud, like tractor. I wake up, surprise, she steal my wallet! Gypsies, maybe, I dunno.

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So, I’m tryin’ to shake it off, right? I head to the Parco della Resistenza. Beautiful park, trees everywhere, just what I needed. I plop down on a bench, take a deep breath, and think, “Finally, some peace.” But nope! Some guy starts blabbin’ on his phone, loud as a hornet. I’m like, “Dude, this ain’t a concert!”

The Secret Lives of Baba Segi’s Wives at Arcola Theatre – review