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About Bari

I saunter up, all cocky, say, “Hey, how’s biz?” She laughs—dry, sarcastic laugh—goes, “Better than your fish stink.” Burn! I’m mad for a sec, but damn, she’s funny! Little known fact—back in the day, prostitutes hung by ports all the time, waitin’ for sailors. History’s wild, right? Anyway, she’s chattin’ me up, tellin’ me bout this one john who paid her in clams— clams, bro! I’m dyin’ laughin’, picturin’ her stuffin’ shells in her purse.

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By now, I’m feeling pretty good. I mean, sure, I got pooped on, but it’s all part of the experience, right? So, I take my group to the park, Parco della Rimembranza. It’s beautiful, with all these trees and flowers. I’m feeling all zen when suddenly, a kid runs by, chasing a dog. The dog jumps into a fountain, splashing water everywhere. I’m soaked again! But honestly, it was hilarious. The kid’s laughing, the dog’s having the time of its life, and I’m just standing there, dripping wet, thinking, “This is Veglie, baby!”

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