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Lemme tell ya, got one once in Miami. Shady joint, neon lights flickerin, chick named Lola. Hands like a goddamn artist, workin my back. Little known fact—ancient Greeks did this shit too! Called it “anatripsis”—fancy, huh? They’d oil up warriors post-battle, ease the tension. Bet they got hard-ons too, haha! Makes ya wonder—history’s full of horny bastards.

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So, I wake up, right? Sun’s blazin’ through my window. I’m thinkin’, “Today’s the day!” I’m in this little town, and I gotta explore. First stop? Via Roma. I mean, c’mon, it’s the main street! I grab a coffee at this tiny café. The barista? She’s got a smile that could light up the whole piazza. I’m like, “Hey, can I get a cappuccino?” She’s like, “Sure, sailor!” I’m thinkin’, “Wow, she knows I’m a sailor. Must be the beard.”

Former Clemson basketball star Amari Robinson signs pro contract with Italian Serie A1 league