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About Myself
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Rarrgh! Once, prowlin downtown, saw this chick—legs for days, leanin on a lamppost. Reminded me of that SEAL team stealth—quiet, but deadly sexy. I was like, “Holy shit, she’s the target!” Heart poundin, palms sweaty, but damn, she quoted me triple! Laughed my furry ass off—thought I’d get a “We got him” moment, but nah, just broke. Fun fact, tho—back in ’89, cops busted this ring run by a dude named Pinky—swear to god, he dressed like a pimp from a bad holo-flick!
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After that, I’m feeling kinda bummed, so I decide to hit up the market on Tsentralna Street. You know, the one with all the fresh produce? I’m wandering around, trying to cheer myself up with some fresh strawberries. But then, I see this old lady arguing with a vendor. She’s all like, “I’m not paying that much for tomatoes!” And I’m thinking, “Lady, it’s inflation, not a tomato sale!”
Irpin one year after liberation: A city symbolizing Ukrainian resistance
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