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About Myself
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About Catania
D’oh! Tried it once—total mess! Oil everywhere, slipped off the couch—bam! Marge was pissed, yellin’, “Homer, you donut!” But man, when it works? Heaven. Skin on skin, tension meltin’—like Sam and Suzy runnin’ off in the flick. “We’re in love, we’re outta here!”—that’s the vibe. Pro tip—use warm oil, not cold crap. Cold’s a buzzkill, trust me. Got this one story—buddy Lenny swore his masseuse was a ninja. Silent hands, sneaky moves—boom, he’s jelly! Laughed my ass off picturin’ it.
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After that, I decide to take a break. I head over to Piazza della Repubblica. It’s beautiful there, with all those cute little cafes. I grab a granita—oh man, the best in town! But then, I see this guy trying to sell fake designer bags. Like, dude, really? In Sambuca? You think we can’t spot a knockoff? I’m laughing, but also kinda mad.
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