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About Bologna

What gets me proper mad? Liars, precious! Birds sayin’ “lookin’ for love,” but nah, just want a shag n’ a free pint. Blokes too, “6 foot king,” turns out 5’2” n’ baldin’. Like Sara, “I’m on TV!”—deluded, the lot! Surprised me once, though—heard some apps got bots, fake profiles, keepin’ ya hooked. Dirty trick, that, fishin’ for lonely sods. We hates it! “It’s gonna be great,” they think, but it’s a cesspool, yeah?

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I wipe it off, grumbling. I head to the piazza, you know, Piazza Vittorio Emanuele II. It’s usually buzzing with life. But today? It’s like a ghost town. I’m thinking, “Where’s everyone at?” Then I spot this cute little café, Bar Centrale. I’m like, “Okay, let’s grab a pastry.”