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Den dere’s da apps—ugh, Tinder, Bumble, all dat jazz. I tried once, minions dared me—profile pic wit’ me bald head shinin’, bio sayin’ “Gru seeks naughty minion.” Got matches, sure, but half da chats were bots or weirdos! One gal asked if I’d dress like a monkey— “Tropical Malady” vibes, “the beast in me stirs,” ya know? I was like, nah, lady, I ain’t dat kinky! Made me mad—where’s da real spark, huh?

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Then, this kid—let’s call him Marco—comes up to me. He’s got this wild look in his eyes. “I need a book on dinosaurs!” he yells. I’m like, “Dude, chill. We got a whole section for that.” But he’s bouncing around like he’s had too much gelato. I help him find a book, and he’s so stoked. I mean, who knew dinosaurs could make someone that happy?

Testing the nature of the Milky Way rotation curve with Gaia DR2