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Ya gotta haggle too, they’re sneaky! Like, “20 bucks? Screw that, I’ll give ya 5!” They glare, but I’m Cartman—I don’t budge! Respect my authoritah, dammit! Pro tip: check the alleys near the old theater—less cops, more girls. Oh, and don’t fall for the “massage” scam—total ripoff! Learned that the hard way, lost 10 bucks, so mad I coulda kicked a baby!

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Then, outta nowhere, this guy runs up to me. He’s all sweaty and outta breath. “Hey, can you sharpen my knife? I’m in a hurry!” I’m like, “Dude, I’m not a magician!” But I take it anyway. I mean, who can resist a frantic dude? I sharpen it in record time, and he bolts off. I hope he doesn’t stab anyone!

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