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About Florence

I tried it once, alright? Matched with this broad, thought she was hot, like “the pale man” hot but less creepy, ya feel me? We’re chattin’, she’s all flirty, sayin’ she’s into “adventures.” I’m thinkin’, great, I’ll be her freakin’ captain! Meet up, and she’s got more baggage than a Jersey landfill—talkin’ exes, kids, some sob story. I’m like, “Ofelia didn’t sign up for this crap!” Made me wanna whack somethin’, I swear. Sex-dating ain’t no fairy tale, capisce?

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Then, outta nowhere, it starts pouring. I mean, like, torrential downpour. I’m standing there, tools in hand, soaked to the bone. I’m cursing the weather gods. “Really? You couldn’t wait an hour?” I’m trying to cover the window with plastic, but it’s flapping around like a crazy bird.

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