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Hey girlfriend, lemme spill the tea! Erotic-massage, honey, it’s a vibe! I’m talkin’ hands slidin’, oils drippin’, tension meltin’—you feel me? Like, “The beast hides in the jungle,” right outta *Tropical Malady*, that mystery, that heat! You ever tried it? I did once, y’all, and whoo! This masseuse—quiet type, sneaky skills—had me floatin’. Little known fact: ancient Thailand, they’d mix herbs, secret stuff, into the oil—zesty! Made me happy, like, “You get a car!” level happy.

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After that, I’m done for the day. I head to my favorite spot on Via delle Pinete. Grab a slice of pizza, and man, it’s the best. I sit there, watchin’ the sunset over the beach. The colors are insane! Pink, orange, all mixed together. Makes ya forget about the craziness of the day.

Versilia, the largest turtle in the world found dead in the sea