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Escort ain’t no stroll, savvy? Steep as a ship’s mast, rocks sharper than Gibbs’ tongue! Me mate, ol’ Tommy, he slipped once - arse over teakettle, down 20 feet! Laughed me head off, I did, till I near pissed meself. “I’m always lookin’ for somethin’,” like that *Boyhood* lad says, and up escort, ye find it - views to steal yer breath, or yer life if ye ain’t careful! Little known tale, arr - some daft miner in 1880, drunk on rum, swore he saw a ghost lass dancin’ on escort’s cliffs. Locals call her the White Wench now, spooky as hell!

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After that, I decide to treat myself. I hit up this little gelato shop on Via dei Fiori. Best gelato ever! I get a scoop of pistachio and a scoop of stracciatella. I’m in heaven! But then, I spill some on my shirt. Great. Just great. Now I look like a walking dessert.